12 January 2010

Reevaluating Life

It's time. You know that feeling? When you stop and think that the time has come to reevaluate who you are and what you do? That's where I am.

As some may know, I turned 30 just a shade under 2 months ago, and perhaps it's the combination of not being where I thought I'd be at this place in my life (more on that later) and the new year, but somehow this became the right time. A lot of things are under reconsideration, at this point, but there are a few things I know for sure.

1) I'm too fat. Yeah, I said it out loud. I'm over it. Time to move on.
2) My life is on track. Really.
3) I'm content, but that doesn't mean I don't need to make some changes.
4) I still miss karate. It's time to check out what there is in the dojo world here.

I've taken the effort to have a few tough conversations, send a few mea culpas, and generally cut loose some of the baggage, but there's more to do. I've started cleaning up my eating and exercise habits, but there's still more to do. I've stopped traveling (for awhile, anyway), but there's a way to go before I'm stabilized here. I've taken a fairly objective look at where I am, and overall it's good. Maybe I haven't done some of the things I thought I'd do by 30, but that doesn't mean the things I have done aren't the right ones.

Some changes that I need to make:

1) I need a mentorship relationship with an older woman who can provide godly counsel to me. I don't even begin to know where to look. I think, perhaps, she should not be a part of my church, so that she can provide a more objective look at my contributions there.
2) I have to lose weight. Yeah, at some point the extra 10 or 15 lbs will have a serious adverse effect on my health, and now's the time to do something about it. Getting hooked up with a local dojo will help a lot.
3) I need to document where I am now. It's been almost 9 years since I had professional photographs taken. Perhaps there won't be posterity to care, but when I'm an old woman, I think I'll like to look back and remember.
4) Dad's right. I need to stimulate my intellect. While I have no desire to reenter academia, perhaps the idea of auditing some post-grad classes isn't such a bad idea. At the very least, I need to embark on some more specific educational pursuits. My habit of reading 60+ books a year doesn't necessarily translate to advancing my education in any area.

Perhaps I need to start journaling. Perhaps putting me down on paper will help me to more correctly evaluate my existence. I need to have the proper perspective to know where I'm going, how I need to get there, and what I need to change to do that. I guess that's what I'm doing by writing this post. A life documented seems to mean something more than one that just goes by. Without someone to bear witness to me, I suppose it's down to me to bear witness for myself.

Just some thoughts.
Happy New Year.